Building a Godly Self-Concept

This blog builds on the previous blog by helping you build a godly self-concept, thus increasing your potential for joy. It provides steps to help build a healthy self-concept that are individual, can be done in congruence with one another or individually, and when applied, increase your potential for joy.

Step 1: Recognize the True Source
As detailed in the previous blog, you must recognize, see yourself, and live as a child of God. Basing your self-worth on what others think of you is not self-worth, and doing so states that you think what other humans think of you is more important than what God thinks of you. You have already been approved by God, and your love for yourself should mirror His love for you. You are a new creation in God. Consider constantly the self-image you are building with the flow of words, pictures, and images that go through your mind in a day, and make them captive to the true person you are in God.

Step 2: Forgive Others Without Exception
Living in the past won't let you realize your potential for joy. You can't feel great about yourself when you lug around resentment from old wounds. Don't let them fester from excessive attention. Instead, become a forgiving machine and make it part of your daily joy ritual.

Step 3: Forgive Yourself Early and Often
You have been forgiven by God if you truly believe in your heart that Christ is Lord and that He died for your sins. Do not live any longer in the guilt of your sin. Guilt is not practical. It forces you to experience the present moment while being paralyzed by past mistakes. Don't let it ground you. Sin does not make you any less valuable to God. Accept God's forgiveness and forgive yourself daily, that you may live in joy instead of guilt. Don't expect to feel different immediately after forgiving yourself, as the emotional blessing often lags behind the actual act of forgiveness. Accept His grace and restoration, realize that you have something to learn from slipping, and move on, attempting to live differently from that moment on.

Step 4: Focus on your God-Given Strengths
This is essentially identifying with the fact that God created you as a unique individual. Highlight and praise God for the special gifts and talents He has blessed you with. Don't focus on your shortcomings, but rather focus on your blessings. Surrender the idea that you need someone or something else to make you complete. Recognize that as God's child you have everything you need.

And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus (Phil 4:19)

Don't compete with others; instead, focus on competing against your God-given potential. You are the only one you can control! Evaluate your progress in light of your full potential, not in comparison to others.

Step 5: Eliminate Negative Self-Talk, Introduce Joy Talk
Changing the way you communicate with yourself changes your self-concept faster than any other method.

The tongue has the power of life and death. (Prov 18:21)

Speak to and about yourself as if you've already fulfilled your highest potential instead of always beating up on yourself. The words you use today will create the world you will experience tomorrow. Thus, depending on your focus, that is either a great problem or a great opportunity. Speak only what you seek. Speak and act as if you are living the life of your dreams, your self-ideal. Start programming your mind by first disciplining your mouth.

Step 6: Practice Extreme Self-Care
Care meticulously for your mind, spirit and body. When you take good care of yourself, yo are more likely to feel good and make decisions that will release your breaks and keep you full of joy. Some self-care factors to consider are listed below:
1. Am I living the life God intends for me?
2. Do I have a clear, compelling vision for my future?
3. Am I investing time alone with God each day?
4. Does anyone in my life hold me accountable to my best self?
5. Do I consistently make healthy food and drink choices?
6. Am I exercising regularly?
7. Am I getting good regular sleep?
8. Do I have at least three close personal relationships?
9. Do I have margin built into my lifestyle?
10. Am I focused on progress rather than perfection?

Use the answers to these questions to develop a plan to get you where you want and need to be.

Step 7: Dwell on the Person God Wants You to Become (Your Self-Ideal)
There is much more to you and who you are than our current reality. You need to escape from the limitations of the current moment and shine your spotlight, your attention, on your full potential. In order to do this, you must define what you believe God wants you to become so you can focus your attention on that. Remember that nothing is impossible with God.

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than we ask or imagine according to his power that is at work within us. (Eph 3:20)

What is impossible with men is possible with God (Luke 18:27)

Use your spiritual eyes, your eyes of faith, in your daily living. You can do this by designing a set of short and long-term goals as well as a mission statement and compare your behavior to it daily or weekly. In other words, dwell on your self-ideal and make it your primary importance and focus in life.

Step 8: Act with Joy Now
Joy is proactive happiness. It is a learned capacity to display your faith ahead of time by means of your daily mental attitude. It is a matter of faithfully believing in God's divine plan for you even in your toughest circumstances. In order to do this, you should focus on living each hour as if your full potential has been reached; look at your circumstances from this perspective and see what could be if you changed your attitude and allowed God to work in the situation. Look at things with the eyes of one whose faith rests in God, not in yourself. Don't be reactive in your responses. View others, as well, as if they have reached their fullest potential; view them as Christ views them, with love and grace, and react to that view of the person, not what you currently perceive.

What Can I Do?

1. Recognize that God is the true source of self-worth as my Creator. Accept His love and acceptance, reject the negativity of the world's opinion, and constantly take captive every negative thought and test it against what you know is the truth of God.
2. Forgive others now and often. Don't drag resentment around with you - it slows you from reaching true joy and is not congruent with your self-ideal.
3. Forgive yourself daily. Accept God's forgiveness and quit living in guilt. To do otherwise to to minimize the true effectiveness, power, and love of God. Accept His grace and restoration- you are not too good for it!
4. Focus on your God-given strengths. Recognize that you have all you need in God. Stop competing with others and instead compete with your full potential.
5. Eliminate negative self-talk and practice joy talk. Start programming your mind by first disciplining your mouth. Speak only what you seek.
6. Practice extreme self care. Focus on your mental, spiritual, social, and physical health. Set and pursue goals in each area.
7. Dwell on your self-ideal. Define who it is God wants you to be and dwell on being that person. Memoriz, rehearse, re-read, and dwell on your mission statement.
8. Live with joy now, resting in your faith in God that He is in control and has your best interest at heart. In every circumstance, good or bad, trust that God is in control, rest in that peace, and change your attitude for the better. Live from your full potential and view others with the eyes of Christ as their full potential, in love, and joy will abound.

My Application

Wow, this is a huge chapter totally based on application. I think that the whole thing sums up things I need to do. I view each and every day as a struggle and an attempt to achieve, instead of as a blessing from God. I live in fear and judgement instead of in joy and peace based on the salvation from Christ. I get so caught up in the day to day stressors and putting out fires that I start living in the world instead of living separate from it. I guesstimate that I only take 20% of my thoughts and inputs captive and apply them to God's ideals. I drag around resentment from past offenses and a judgemental attitude toward others all day long. I can readily identify the wrongs of others and how they have wronged me. I know my sin and consequently drag its guilt around with me all the time, letting it separate me from God's love via a lie called unworthiness. I live in a needy fashion, depending on outside sources for input for my self-worth. I don't recognize God's provision and my completeness in Him in all situations. I compare myself with others frequently and strive to "be the best" of my company. Negative self-talk pervades me and is a main reason my guilt as I constantly tell myself how unworthy I am due to my failures. I don't practice extreme self-care except in the instance of exercise; I don't have a clear vision of who God wants me to be, I don't have a regular quiet time, I am not held accountable to anyone, I don't eat healthy most of the time and I turn to food for comfort, I get irregular sleep, I don't have close relationships, I have little time to schedule margin into my life, and I constantly focus on perfection (thus causing increased guilt when I constantly fail). I don't know what my self-ideal is as it has not been revealed to me as of yet, and as stated earlier I am constantly seeing the trees and obstacles instead of the forest. I dwell on my past and failures much more than my forgiven state through the grace of God. Finally, I live in a reactive mindset instead of a proactive one, and I constantly display my lack of faith in God's omnipotence by not trusting that He knows what is best for me and acts in love toward me.

So what do I do? I don't focus on all those negatives!! Instead, I rely on the Word of God to confirm and instill the above truths in my mind and attempt to take captive every thought and image that enters my mind. I focus on God's grace, His provision, and His redemption, and attempt to live by faith each and every day. I spend time in prayer and I express my concerns to Him. I wait on Him to reveal His will to me for my life. I praise God for His graciousness and provision of forgiveness and ask for forgiveness from my sin. I do what I can - I believe, I affirm my faith, and I trust in God's goodness and grace, and I live in love and of love.

For it is by grace you have been save, through faith - an this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God - not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. (Eph 2:8-9)