Self Concept
Your self-concept, which is what you think about yourself, is reflected in our actions. To change your actions, and thus increase joy, you must become aware of and change your self-concept.
As water reflects a man's face, so a man's heart reflects the man. (Prov 27:19)
Thus by their fruit you will recognize them. (Matt 7:20)
Your self-concept either expands or restricts your potential for joy. As detailed in a previous blog, what you think and dwell upon is what tends to become reality. Thus, with each thought, your self-concept moves either toward or away from your highest potential. To move toward your highest potential, you must realize who you truly are and who you are to become!
In regards to who you truly are, you must realize whose you are.
For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. (Eph 2:10)
How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called Children of God. (1 John 3:12)
We are spiritual beings, living a temporary human experience. We are designed to fulfill a role by God, for God, that is individually made for each and every person. Thus, dwelling on our human nature results only in discouragement and underachievement since we are not infallible and are sinful. These are the effects of the world which stain our self-concept and results in feelings of unworthiness. Instead we should live with the perspective of our Creator by seeing ourselves in our true identity, as a beloved child of God. Your true identity and value comes from God, not from the dominant exposures in the world.
To refine your self-concept, you must be aware of three essential elements that make it up.
Self Image
This is the current picture of how you see yourself today. It is formed primarily from your environmental influences (what others say about you, what you perceive others to think about you, and what you think about yourself), and it is the subconscious mechanism responsible for guiding your behavior. It is critical to understand your self-image because this is the mental construct of the self with which we most often act consistently. Your self-image determines how you use your time, talents, knowledge, skills and experiences. If you are unwilling to change your self image, then you will most likely continue to repeat the same things you've always done. You will hardly ever feel like acting in a manner that is inconsistent with your self-image. But you can override your past negative programming by choosing new behaviors that are in line with your God-given potential. How do you do this? By changing your thinking. Instead of attributing success to lady luck (the great "impostor") and attributing your failures to the true you, switch it around. Consider your successes as representing the true you, the you at its fullest potential, who you are truly meant to be, and your failures as the Impostor. In other words, don't over-identify with the negatives in life. Dismiss them for what they are and remind yourself of your true potential. Remember, you experience that which you give the most attention to!
Self Ideal
This is your future picture of yourself, the best you could imagine yourself to be. It is what your life would look like if everything were perfect. By holding this view of the self in the forefront of your mind, it prompts you unconsciously to make decisions that navigate your way to your future destination. This takes you from living life in your current self-image state to living life in an ideal state. To do this, you must have some idea of what your self-ideal truly is. You can gain insight to your self-ideal by developing a detailed personal mission statement. This is a conscious, written articulation of your full potential from God's point of view. Your personal mission statement, as well as developing lifetime goals become a physical tool you can use to fine-tune your self ideal.
Self Worth
Your self-worth is the private reputation you hold of yourself. Most people's self worth comes from the world, from messages they have received from family, TV, loved ones, and even enemies. However, true self-worth is authentic self-esteem rooted in your uniqueness as a child of God.
All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. (Ps 139:16)
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. (Ps. 139:14)
What is man that you are mindful of him, the son of man that you care for him? You made him a little lower than the heavenly beings and crowned him with glory and honor. (Ps 8:4-5)
As the above verses demonstrate, you are important to God. He has created you as an individually special and unrepeatable miracle. He has great plans for your life, and you should trust His word more than the words of others as appraisal of your value as a person. Self-worth is thus not based on achievements, but on the significance you place on your life outside of your performance. In other words, it is based on your identity as one created and loved by God.
Thus, to change your self-concept, you have to identify your self-image, define your self-ideal, and identify your self-worth with God's view. You must learn to reject negative messages, bring your self-ideal to the forefront of your thought life so you can subsequently act according to it to change your life down its path, and place your value as a person not in the world's hands, but in God's hands.
What can I do?
- Be willing to change your self-concept day by day, every day. Make it a focus.
- Re-define your self concept. Realize that you are a child of God, living a temporary human existence.
- Do not dwell on your human experience. Live with spiritual eyes and see yourself as a true Child of God.
- Change your self-image by identifying with your successes and dismissing your failures. Don't accept the world's inputs for who you are. Identify yourself with God.
- Define your self-ideal. Develop a personal mission statement and personal goals as revealed to you by God. Keep that ideal in the forefront of your mind and focus on living your self-ideal every moment.
- Develop good self-worth. Don't accept the world's input as to your self-worth. Reject its negative messages and instead accept your identity as a unique and cared for child of God.
My Application
To me, this blog can be summarized by the words of Jesus in John 15:19:
If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world.
To experience joy, I must no longer accept the inputs of the world for my self-worth and my self-image. I must realize that I am a child of God, uniquely and wonderfully made, for His purposes in this world. My identity does not come from the TV, or my patients, my kids, my wife, my family, or my accomplishments. They are a part of me, but they are not my identity. I must recognize my identity as God's child. I need to identify who God wants me to be, my self-ideal, and live with that perspective every day, every moment, and make it my primary focus. This involves being conscious of my thoughts and actions at all times from God's perspective, which is, in essence, living as a Christian should. I need to develop my mission statement from a heavenly viewpoint, as well as subsequent goals. I need to prayerfully seek God's guidance and vision in this area of my life, as God has directed me to this point in life, but not further. Finally, I need to constantly learn to reject the world's message to me of who I am and what makes me important by limiting my inputs and remain focused on God's view of me and His ultimate purposes for me in this world. My value and worth do not come from the world, but rather from my Creator, and I am dearly loved and created for love and joy.
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